Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Dirranbandi Grandi


Dirranbandi Grandi 

Grand dad came down from Dirranbandi and he humped his swag up on the train
Then he slept out on me veranda and thanked Huey it didn’t rain
He tells anyone he’s from the bush and that’s he’s very proud of that
He says he loves the bloody heat and that the whole flamin world should be flat
He says he learnt to ride a horse himself!!  long before he could even walk
N’That a cook taught’im how to swear like a shearer before he learnt to talk

Me Granddad only ever had one car that could fill the whole list on his extensive quota
He’s never seen anything that’d come close to his 1961 tray back two door white Toyota
Well me sister rocked up to see him with her stuck up city banker high flyer creep
Bragging bout their luxury four door all wheel drive turbo charged black as night Jeep
The banker told his fancy tale to us though his story came quiet uninvited
He listed all the features this Jeep thing had and the diff gear ratios were precisely cited

Ol Granddad just bit his lip then sat back and rolled another log cabin smoke
Show the flamin thing some dust dirt ‘n gravel and he reckoned that it’d flamin choke
The ol bugger tipped his akubra to the ladies and then nodded his goodbyes
Taking out his filled hip flask with a determined thirsty look in his eyes
He finished off his rum as he stretched upon the verandah again upon his swag
Then smiled a drunken smile and laughed out loudly like it was the best idea he’d ever had

Chirp chirp went the jeep when the keyless tag was directed poorly at the floor
The bloody parkin lights came on with the computer actually openin up the flaming door
“Welcome Sir” a British voice said to him as he clambered drunkedley and hoped inside
“Do not forget to buckle up Sir, or I cannot take you any where for a ride”
Ping ping the car went as he found the strap and stuck it in the holster right beside his hip
Some green light was flashing upon the dash so granddad pushed it and thus began his trip

“What’s your destination Sir please key in the address for where it is you’d like to go”
Granddad said “well bugger me”  the computer replied  that request it did not know
He braced himself adjusted the mirror but the seat he just could not seem to move
Somehow he pushed 98.9 on the radio and Old Slim came on makin ol granddad groove
He hit the garage door for he had not figured out yet the need to push the button
Then he cursed to himself  this piece of garbage is just lamb dressed up as mutton

The door was open now and the Jeep an it's reckless pilot were out in the street
Granddad smiled to himself as “lights on the hill” helped him to keep his beat
They headed for the freeway for he knew that was the way he came
He found it hard to find the wipers as the wind swept off some of the rain
He thought about his Mabel and the nights they spent on blueberry hill
That’s were he and the jeep was heading he just hoped the jeep had the will

For the road to lovers leap was nothing less then an ol bush track 
At night it would be a journey where only the Toyota could get him back
He drove straight through the wire fence and at that he was impressed
He got a glimpse of Mabel as the pattern reminded him of her dress
He looked out of the windscreen and could see the peak way up high
He dropped her into to second gear and made that gearbox cry

The wheels started slipping but he would not be  turning back
The wire wrapped around them an made a click click click clack
He tried to find the old path that once had gone right around the trees
The jeep she was hangin in there and had come thus far with ease
Things got dark on one side as he miss calculated a hidden rock
The bump nearly threw him from his seat and gave him quiet a shock

He didn’t see the puddle in front of him, which was almost a lake
He was right in the middle of it when he decided it was time to brake
The car came to halt the water was almost right up to the door
He laughed and said “there now darling that’s what they made ya for”
He dropped her into low with the wheels making a watery sound
Then the spray came in the window as he lowered it, to look around

Back on his mission when he had almost topped the flamin hill
The engine making a noise that could only be described as shrill
Somehow the jeep then got side ways as it skidded into a tree
But granddad revved her up and turned the wheel and they broke free
It wasn’t very far now as he saw through the rain to the very top
The jeep was going to make it with this his jaw had slightly dropped

What the poor bugger didn’t know was some rich man had bought the other side
He’d built a mansion on the cliff face that was now his joy and his pride
Four stories of luxury with a view that was nearly impossible to beat
A bloody great big palace on a mountain where the bush and city meet
Granddad must’ve really felt like he was a just a flamin bloody fool
As him an the jeep skidded through the landscaping the marble right into the pool

It would have been a funny sight for the millionaire and his new wife
To see the old bugger saturated an dog paddling tryin to save his own life
They fished him out together and he drunkardly tried to give'em a thank
Then they watched the bubbles disappear as the Jeep beneath the water sank
Granddad lied and told them it was the first time he had ever driven in town
The jeep was bloody tough but he doubted that his land-cruiser woulda drowned
Jeffrey Goudy 04/03/2013

Grand dad came down from Dirranbandi and he humped his swag up on the train
Then he slept out on me veranda and thanked Huey it didn’t rain
He tells anyone he’s from the bush and that’s he’s very proud of that
He says he loves the bloody heat and that the whole flamin world should be flat
He says he learnt to ride a horse himself!!  long before he could even walk
N’That a cook taught’im how to swear like a shearer before he learnt to talk

Me Granddad only ever had one car that could fill the whole list on his extensive quota
He’s never seen anything that’d come close to his 1961 tray back two door white Toyota
Well me sister rocked up to see him with her stuck up city banker high flyer creep
Bragging bout their luxury four door all wheel drive turbo charged black as night Jeep
The banker told his fancy tale to us though his story came quiet uninvited
He listed all the features this Jeep thing had and the diff gear ratios were precisely cited

Ol Granddad just bit his lip then sat back and rolled another log cabin smoke
Show the flamin thing some dust dirt ‘n gravel and he reckoned that it’d flamin choke
The ol bugger tipped his akubra to the ladies and then nodded his goodbyes
Taking out his filled hip flask with a determined thirsty look in his eyes
He finished off his rum as he stretched upon the verandah again upon his swag
Then smiled a drunken smile and laughed out loudly like it was the best idea he’d ever had

Chirp chirp went the jeep when the keyless tag was directed poorly at the floor
The bloody parkin lights came on with the computer actually openin up the flaming door
“Welcome Sir” a British voice said to him as he clambered drunkedley and hoped inside
“Do not forget to buckle up Sir, or I cannot take you any where for a ride”
Ping ping the car went as he found the strap and stuck it in the holster right beside his hip
Some green light was flashing upon the dash so granddad pushed it and thus began his trip

“What’s your destination Sir please key in the address for where it is you’d like to go”
Granddad said “well bugger me”  the computer replied  that request it did not know
He braced himself adjusted the mirror but the seat he just could not seem to move
Somehow he pushed 98.9 on the radio and Old Slim came on makin ol granddad groove
He hit the garage door for he had not figured out yet the need to push the button
Then he cursed to himself  this piece of garbage is just lamb dressed up as mutton

The door was open now and the Jeep an it's reckless pilot were out in the street
Granddad smiled to himself as “lights on the hill” helped him to keep his beat
They headed for the freeway for he knew that was the way he came
He found it hard to find the wipers as the wind swept off some of the rain
He thought about his Mabel and the nights they spent on blueberry hill
That’s were he and the jeep was heading he just hoped the jeep had the will

For the road to lovers leap was nothing less then an ol bush track 
At night it would be a journey where only the Toyota could get him back
He drove straight through the wire fence and at that he was impressed
He got a glimpse of Mabel as the pattern reminded him of her dress
He looked out of the windscreen and could see the peak way up high
He dropped her into to second gear and made that gearbox cry

The wheels started slipping but he would not be  turning back
The wire wrapped around them an made a click click click clack
He tried to find the old path that once had gone right around the trees
The jeep she was hangin in there and had come thus far with ease
Things got dark on one side as he miss calculated a hidden rock
The bump nearly threw him from his seat and gave him quiet a shock

He didn’t see the puddle in front of him, which was almost a lake
He was right in the middle of it when he decided it was time to brake
The car came to halt the water was almost right up to the door
He laughed and said “there now darling that’s what they made ya for”
He dropped her into low with the wheels making a watery sound
Then the spray came in the window as he lowered it, to look around

Back on his mission when he had almost topped the flamin hill
The engine making a noise that could only be described as shrill
Somehow the jeep then got side ways as it skidded into a tree
But granddad revved her up and turned the wheel and they broke free
It wasn’t very far now as he saw through the rain to the very top
The jeep was going to make it with this his jaw had slightly dropped

What the poor bugger didn’t know was some rich man had bought the other side
He’d built a mansion on the cliff face that was now his joy and his pride
Four stories of luxury with a view that was nearly impossible to beat
A bloody great big palace on a mountain where the bush and city meet
Granddad must’ve really felt like he was a just a flamin bloody fool
As him an the jeep skidded through the landscaping the marble right into the pool

It would have been a funny sight for the millionaire and his new wife
To see the old bugger saturated an dog paddling tryin to save his own life
They fished him out together and he drunkardly tried to give'em a thank
Then they watched the bubbles disappear as the Jeep beneath the water sank
Granddad lied and told them it was the first time he had ever driven in town
The jeep was bloody tough but he doubted that his land-cruiser woulda drowned

Jeffrey Goudy 04/03/2013 Copyright Poetry in Paradise Reg TM No. 1028534

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